well
i found my new home
and drove out to the dmv
to reregister my truck
and cruise away in happy glee
so i parked outside
and headed to their dreary keep
took my place in line with all of the other sheep
about twelve
hours later made it up to the clerk
little bespeckled fellow with a facial tick quirk
little man looked up at me and with a small tiny look
twisted smile crossed his face as he said
"did
you being your checkbook?"
tyranny at the
dmv
those greedy parasitic fucking bugs
want more
money from me
two months' paycheck and they ain't done yet
they'll take every freaking penny
they think they can get
so i paid my
fee but they wanted more
i said what's this damn seven hundred dollar charge for
and the man looked at me and through his tiny teeth said
"it's cause you're out of state and you're driving a ford"
well i should
have smashed him then
cause he is a bureaucrat
and them bureaucrats ain't worth the meal that i just shat
but i had an
idea, said hey, i’m exempt
didn’t
have a job last month and my truck is for rent
well he looked
up at me as if I got him in a trap
he said "that may be true i’ll be right back"
he returned with a tome about three feet thick
started leafing through pages
i started
feeling sick
finally found
what he was looking for
and said it was true
"you just saved fifty bucks if your truck ain't blue
or red or white or black or beige or mauve or tan
or peach or cream or green or gray or pink or puce"
what the hell
is your fucking deal
why bother with the paperwork why not just steal
the sycophantic leech he led me to snap
got a gunrack in my truck said i’ll be right back
tyranny at the dmv
they won’t get another pillowbiting penny from me
got a twelve gauge a forty-five and a pocket full of lead
gonna paint this whole filthy pisshole rattrap red
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alec
smith authored this cute little nugget of anger with andy wiemeyer&
justin cook after reregistering
his truck in colorado. around
the time the planning for gauge was getting underway, he moved to
texas and had to reregister his truck again. then, right in the
middle of recording dmv, he sold his truck and bought a new one,
and had to register that. then, right around the time dmv
was being finished, he moved to california, and had to reregister
his truck - again - at a cost of around $800. on the heels of this
he left meb a snarling voicemail about how 'life imitates art',
which unfortunately was lost before it could be mp3-ed.
it
was a matter of idle speculation how long it would take someone
to mention 'columbine' and 'dmv' in the same paragraph. happily,
we now know the answer - hardly any time at all. seven
days in burlington, vermont interrupted an otherwise favorable
review to mention that "the hint of a columbine-style bloodbath"
was "tasteless" and "not much fun to listen to".
joe
capps didn't like the shotgun at his studio, either.

one
of many trucks: meb's 1981 chevy at poker hill during the gauge
sessions, carrying payload of justin's drum gear and a keg.
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